You've accepted a new job offer that suits your career goals and salary expectations. Your boss feels a wave of apprehension as you hand in your resignation letter to your current employer. In a frantic attempt to persuade you to stay, they react with what appears to be an attractive offer. You were thrilled about the new opportunity, but you are now tempted to stay.
Before making a decision, it's important to ask yourself some tough questions. Here are four critical things to consider:
1. Why wasn't I appreciated before?
Your boss's reaction to your resignation may have more to do with their fear of losing you than with appreciation for your work. If you've been passed over for raises or promotions in the past, it's possible that your boss has been undervaluing you all along. Counteroffers are often motivated more by the trouble of finding a replacement than by actual appreciation for the employee. In some cases, a counteroffer may even be a ruse to buy time until a replacement can be found.
2. What will happen if I decide to stay?
If you decide to stay with your current employer after they've made a counteroffer, it's important to be aware that the relationship has changed. Your boss will now be aware that you were dissatisfied and looking for other job opportunities. This could lead to tension and mistrust going forward. Your colleagues may also start to treat you differently, suspecting that you're looking for a new job every time you dress up for work or take time off for personal appointments.
3. What made me want to leave?
It's important to remember why you were looking for a new job in the first place. Money is rarely the only factor, so consider the other reasons that were motivating you to leave. Think about the scope of your tasks, your team, the business culture, management style, etc. Have those motivations changed at all? Does the counteroffer address those issues, or is it just a wage increase? If an employer promises transformation, proceed with caution—you don't want to be disappointed by empty promises.
4. Is it worth it to take the risk of alienating future employers?
You went through the interview process, met with senior management, negotiated a pay and benefits package, and were presented with an appealing offer… and then you yanked the rug from under them. Ouch. Employers put a lot of effort and money into the hiring process, and having your enthusiastic recruit drop out at the last minute is frustrating. This is where taking a step back and looking at the broader picture comes in handy. Is this a firm I'd wish to work for in the future? Will turning down their offer harm my reputation with this firm, recruiter, or the industry as a whole? Consider all of your alternatives and the consequences. Stay focused on the larger picture and understand where each step is bringing you when making a career change. Saying no to a substantial counteroffer or a guilt trip may require a bold face and strong will, but it may be the decision that saves your career in the long run.
A final message
Whatever you decide, take the time to be deliberate and professional in how you convey your choice so that future opportunities remain open and your reputation remains intact. You'll have to say "no" to someone whether you take the new job or the counteroffer from your existing company. Be courteous, don't drag out the choice any longer than necessary, and don't ghost either party. If you're dealing with a recruiter, be honest with them about your decision (they may be able to offer suggestions to assist you to make your decision!).